Radio: "Trump says if he becomes president, he would turn the Syrian refugees back. He says some refugees could be members of ISIS"
Son 2: "Technically, that's true. They could also be members of KISS"
Me: "Yeah. A lot of Brecht's writings were actually written by the women in his life. But historically that's pretty common in both arts and science. Look at Rosalind Franklin and the discovery of the DNA double helix." Grandpa: "What about Mrs. Einstein, how much did she really do? And Heisenberg's wife? The Uncertainty Principle definitely sounds like something a woman would come up with. Men aren't uncertain about anything."
Son 2: "Some people on the religious right believe there's a high rate of teen pregnancy because god wants it that way. So he impregnates girls. Kind of like Zeus who disguised himself as a swan."
Son 1: "Except god appears in the form of a drunken frat-boy."
Me: "You and beets. I hate beets. I should have raised you too believe you're allergic to beets."
Son 1: "I would have tried them anyway, just to rebel."
Son 1: "Yep. Just like how I rub cats on my face and huff pollen."